4 lines to use when approaching someone at a bar
Mark Zuckerberg is doing a dance somewhere right now because he won. We are all online creatures, and lately when I go into a bar I notice that nobody is chatting people up anymore. Goddamn it. We need to rage against the MetaVerse! Let’s touch grass and get some in-person ass!
Yes, solitude is nice, but when I go out - I’m going out because I want to meet and talk to new people. And I see online that everyone complains about no one talking to each other at bars anymore - so let’s be the bunch that takes the first stab at bringing back chatty bar culture.
Below are 4 lines that I like to use when I’m out and about to start chatting up people naturally, and I suggest you use the same!
“Can you help us settle a bet?”
God, I used to use this all the time in college. You need to have a friend with you to do this, but it’s a perfect line because you can use this line on a person who is by themselves, another group of two, even a group of 12.
Turn around or nearby to someone, tap their shoulder and say, “hey, do you mind helping us settle a bet?”
The bet can be anything you want. How to properly pronounce the word “niche,” which mammal is fastest, or anything in between. Check out this Reddit thread for some good ideas.
It’s a great way to tell if someone is interested because they’ll either give you a curt answer (subtle sign they don’t want to talk) or get heavily into the debate and then boom, you’re now in conversation.
2. “What’s good here?”
This is similar to the “what are you drinking” line, but with a twist. I personally feel like “what are you drinking” implies that you’ll be buying a drink for that person, and “what’s good here?” is a casual ice-breaker that simply asks for advice.
It’s important to note where you do this. It works best at a cocktail bar, or any place where there is a menu with specialty drinks. If you say this at a dive bar, odds are you’ll get a weird look and your Object of Affection will just say “umm…I mean…order whatever you like to drink?”. So save this for a craft beer place, speakeasy, anything of that vibe.
And then, of course, follow it up with making a joke about one of the cocktail drink names, or how you’re glad to be having this because your day was so long - just anything really that gives them a chance to engage.
3. Lie and say you just moved here
Everyone loves to dole out advice - look at me! That’s what my entire blog is about. People live for this stuff.
Go up to someone and say, “hey, I just recently moved here, I was wondering if you could give me any suggestions for good food in the area.”
They’ll most likely list off a few places, and then you have a great segway to ask how long they’ve lived here for, how they heard about that restaurant, which dish is the best to order there, etc. And if the vibe is right, say you’re going to head to the spot they recommended, and hey do they want to come with?
The only problem is that now you’re lying! So here’s how you solve it: halfway through dinner with them, say that you have to confess something, and that you lied about recently moving here because you just wanted to talk to them. If you wait any longer to spill the beans than that, you probably won’t come across that great. It’s a risky maneuver, but worth it!
4. “I’m tired of talking to my friends, I see them all the time. What are you guys talking about?”
I got this tip in regards to networking, actually, but I think it works even better for picking someone up. Two things here - you need to be out with people (haha) and going up to two or more people.
I think this line is great because a) it implies that you have friends who you hang out with often, just gives off a vibe of popularity and b) it gives you the chance to jump right into their conversation as a 3rd party member.
And if the people look at each other and are like “X’s parent is in the hospital” you can always just be like “on second thought, my friends aren’t so bad” and just head back to them.
I hate to say it, I only have four lines! But you only need one to work and I proudly stand behind all of these.
If you have any lines or tips of your own, feel free to leave them in the comments below! I love hearing about different ways to approach people, honestly I find it kind of fascinating. Maybe in a future life I’ll come back as a Pickup Artist and get really into it.
Ciao for now,
S